#Oh yeah also I'm going to therapy on next week yay.

[lonely-moon-artist-blog]

is painful

I love Curie so much.

Also this art is inspired by you smell of dead flowers.

I am still planning to draw more and I will ... Now.

[acorpsecalledcorva]

Issue I'm dealing with right now is a great example of why I hate people who push the "DID isn't a disorder it's an uwu quirky super power" idea. (Obviously no shade to those who view their own system hood as a net gain but I see people treat 'disorder' or 'maladaptive' as dirty words in general and I find it really demeaning to those who do struggle, myself included obviously, as though it's just a matter of perspective and I just need to turn that frown upside down 🙃)

TW for needle stuff under the cut

So being trans and chronically ill, I have to get blood tests, like, a lot of blood tests. I also use estradiol injections as my primary HRT method. So needless to say, needles are a huge part of my life and healthcare. A couple years ago this was completely fine, I just stare off into space for a 20-30 seconds and it's over before I know it. I dissociate. Very useful skill, been great all my life yay no fear of needles I'm a big girl with my big girl sticker (bandaid).

The last couple years however, things started to go a bit wonky, I've started to pass out during blood tests. I'm fine I'm fine I'm fine and then suddenly the lights go out and I come to with a very apologetic and worried nurse. This led to one hospital visit where I needed to get several tests and so they put a cannula in my arm. Oh boy my brain did not like that solution, my wolf alter fronted and needed to be actively prevented from ripping it out with her teeth.

With my estradiol injections however, something different started happening. I do them weekly on the same day, Thursday, and first I would keep "forgetting" to do them. No Biggie, though, would just do it the first opportunity I remembered to. Then, I started drinking. Every Thursday, without fail, I would remember to do my shot and realise I've been drinking alcohol without even thinking of it. I was getting sabotaged.

Then last week, things got stepped up a gear. After administering my shot it hurt much more than usual. The next day, my jeans waistband was pressing on the bruise(?) and rather than just feeling ow, I started panicking. Every time I would move in a way that hurt it I would instantly be filled with dread. Dread that I had been stabbed and was going to pop my stitches.

Then, as if that wasn't enough, I've been having nightmares about needles getting stuck in my veins and needing to squeeze them out like zits.

So why is all this happening? Because of the dissociation. My brain relied so heavily and readily on dissociation as a coping mechanism for all this needle business, that it became a trauma. All those repeated chronic minor routine events, by not being integrated due to such an inherent tendency to dissociate are bouncing around in my subconscious and upsetting the system.

As such, protectors and persecutors are getting royally pissed off, because it keeps happening, and I keep doing it to myself. They're screaming out at me to stop doing this absolutely horrendous horrible life threatening thing because being mostly locked inside they don't actually understand why I need to do it. They don't care about the outside world, they just care that I'm repeatedly triggering parts of the system and want it to not happen anymore.

This is so endlessly frustrating for me, because I had no issue with needles whatsoever. Everyone else I know who has issues with needles gets exposure therapied into being fine, but for me? I get new trauma from things that shouldn't and wouldn't have been traumatic if it wasn't for my brain operating on automatic responses.

So yeah, fuck dissociation, all my brain homies hate dissociation and I'll bite the next person I see saying that it's inherently a positive force for good in everyone's lives that does it.

[regular-lord-reckoner]

it is spring time and appropriately, i have been a very busy bee !!

i'm on much needed pto and it is wonderful. i somehow managed to get completely caught up on all my work before i left so i'm not stressed about when i go back next week

i've mostly been sleeping a lot which i desperately needed and i've been doing a lot of things i've meant to for a while now

namely scheduling doctors appointments and updating my insurance everywhere i need to and that sort of shit, plus some legal stuff my mom and i are doing for some of my dad's stuff.

since monday i also started finally working on my closet again. i had to stop last time and toss everything back in there because...yeah, but now that i can spread some things out again i've made a lot of progress so far

every day i go in with the goal of getting out at least one bag of stuff to throw away and i've also moved out a bunch of clothes i'll need to sort through and a few other things i might be able to give away

feel like i can actually breathe in there again so that's nice. needed that. i'll probably work on it some more over the next two days and then take a break but it should be a lot easier now that i've really gotten the ball rolling to finish it up and fingers fucking crossed this time it'll be all done by the fall where it can just be my nice closet again and i can actually find things !!

i also finally went to get my oil changed today and fortunately there were no other problems so that went smoothly !! i got it washed, too (not that it matters now because it's pouring rain outside now lol) and i stopped to get my mom a birthday card and a gift bag for her present since her birthday is on monday !!

other than all of that i'm just trying to take it easy and unwind. trying to still rest a lot and not push myself too hard or do anything i don't feel up to.

for the past, mmm, i dunno, while i've just been full of piss and vinegar if that wasn't evident so i've tried to just be real quiet and keep to myself until i can feel less overwhelmed.

i'm still in that time out corner for now but i'm starting to feel a lot better so that's something! i've been doing a lot of cleaning lately as well (i did my bathroom on monday and will be doing laundry all throughout the week as week as well as the usual dishes and garbage duty) so that usually helps me feel a bit better.

it's also very cathartic just...throwing a bunch of shit away !! and having more space !! yay !!

oh, i also finally had therapy again after like...a month and i'm not sure yet what my new insurance situation will look like, but i think we're all happy to be done with my old insurance (she was telling me about something weird they did that i just...cannot fathom (something about mailing her a paper credit card that no one would accept ?? idk), but oh well, good riddance !!) and i'm slowly but surely working on paying her back !!

lastly, i tried a new coffee place today because i'm still trying to figure out which local coffee spot will be my new favorite now that i no longer haunt starbucks or dunkin and i went to this new one today and i....i definitely ordered a chai...a 32 oz one at that because why not, i love chai.... whatever they gave me definitely was not chai.

i'm not sure what it is exactly, but it's definitely got coffee in it and i thought at first maybe it was a dirty chai but no. and it's no big deal, i took it and just drove on but what's baffling to me is i was the only customer at that time.

nobody in front of me, no one behind me and maybe they were doing a mobile order or something but i had to sit there for a few minutes while they made it and it was...not at all what i was expecting, but also not bad !! haven't had an iced coffee in a minute so i'll take it !! (they also put a little chocolate covered espresso bean on the top which was very good)

anyway, i thought that was kinda funny. i've also finished all my chores and errands for the day now so i might take a nap or i might read or who knows what i might do, i actually have time to myself !!!!

just wanted to give a little update since for once it isn't me just bitchin' about things XD

hope if you're reading this that you're doing well and i'll be back to being a human (or as close to it as i get) ....sometime !! <3

[ja0-s-blank-canvas-fic]

Part 3 - Chapter 47 - Limbo

Blank Canvas Part 3

AO3 - here

Fanfiction.net - here

Heyo! Sorry for the delay. I was right in the middle of moving houses and transferring to a different store so I had no time to post last week. I also bought a new mattress that I had to get set up on Tuesday last week on top of everything else. So I was a teeny tiny bit busy. ^___^ Like I've been literally living out of boxes in an almost empty house surrounded by dust bunnies. Only the sound of the show on my laptop and the owls out back for company. -plays the worlds smallest violin for myself- Anyway! Update time is now!

Linktree to all the things!

End notes for the chapter are under the line.

What's going to happen to you indeed. Will the heroes help him or throw him to the wind? We'll find out next time! ^_____^ Oh and if anyone was expecting a reunion with Hitoshi this chapter, sorry to disappoint but we had to get the tough stuff over with before the fluff. And Izuku was still being processed and needed the talk with the authorities first. So yeah, Hitoshi was at the hospital but won't meet up again with Izuku until later.

Condolences to Izuku's hand. It'll be a tough journey but he's still going to try his best going forward. Also me being me, I have plans. ;) And the physical therapy should help judging from my own experience of pt since I messed up my knee. I saw some people in for their hands after surgery and I don’t know much what would be recommended but I’ll do some research and see what I find. But pt does help! I learned some good exercises and tricks to help with my own recovery. So if you ever get injured like me or get surgery def do the pt after.

All the comforting physical support! :D Aizawa figured that out ages ago and Nezu has too. I have read some fics where Nezu was against physical touch due to his years of experimentation. Which valid if it was forced upon him but I'm more going with the animal instincts to comfort those in their pack of sorts. Honestly all of Izuku's mentors have already mentally adopted Izuku anyway so to me they are all a big unofficial family.

So what will happen to Izuku? You'll find out next chapter! Again thank you for the patience. I'm now moved into the new house and officially transferred to the new store. And I am typing this while on my brand new fancy mattress. Now all I gotta do is unpack the gazillion boxes in my room. Yay moving. :P Alrighty. I shall leave y'all with this until next time. Byeee!

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Well, Casualty tonight was excellent!! Apart from Faith Cadogan, of course, but that's the norm and I try to pretend she doesn't exist as a character at this point lol.

Jaye Jacobs and Charles Venn absolutely carried the episode, I think - Donna and Jacob are both always highlights of the week for me anyway, but their performances in this one were incredible.

Jacob's phonecall to Billie just about tipped the scales in favour of Jacob's storyline being the best part for me, though Donna's storyline almost won that title. I wasn't expecting Jacob to be as prominent this week as he turned out to be, so I was very pleasantly surprised! Yay for Jacob!!

Jacob continues to be one of the very best portrayals of a trauma survivor I've ever seen in fiction. I thought this ep wove his storyline in wonderfully, and a lot more than I expected it to. I thought he would mostly just get patient storylines and that would be it, so I was so happy they finally went back to discussing his trauma and even more so that they acknowledged his breakup with Billie. The scene where he and Iain were talking about it was fantastic, though it made me sad that he seemed to feel so guilty for how he talked to her. (Not saying it was okay, he definitely shouldn't have done it, but I really do get where it came from in regards to his trauma.)

I'm just... I'm just so glad Jacob exists, okay? I love him so much and he's very important to me. Sorry, I know I say that whenever I talk about him. Also, on that note, I thought the way he got that man to let Iain go was very clever on his part! He was so wonderful and kind all throughout this ep. :)

And I adored the last scene, when he called Billie to say sorry for how he'd treated her. That was just a beautiful scene (the parallel with Charlie's talk with Jacob back in May made it even more so). Jacob admitting and taking accountability for how he acted - that was great. Maybe next he'll even make that therapy appointment! I really hope he can find some healing and support and forgiveness for himself, he deserves it even if he thinks he doesn't. I think this was a positive step for him mentally and emotionally, and I'm glad of that. I hope his mental health/trauma storyline continues to be this good.

Also, I think Billie will be coming back after all, which I'm pleased about! I really like her as a character and she has wonderful chemistry with Jacob. I'm also very happy Jacob is now a fully-fledged paramedic, even if I'm still confused by him doing all the training in such a short space of time.

Charles Venn has really shown yet again why he's worthy of his Inside Soap Award nomination for Best Drama Star this year. Not only that, he'd be more than worthy of a win! :)

I loved Donna's scenes so much, and Jaye Jacobs was brilliant! Seeing Donna's kindness towards Ashley was just so nice. The scene with her and Ashley on the stairs was possibly the best moment of the episode to me (although Jacob's aforementioned phonecall comes so close).

I also think Donna's coming closer to telling the truth, which is good.

And they've aged Mia's character up a bit - Donna said Mia is 19, tonight, when she should be more like 17. That was odd. But I feel like it's going to end up being a Fredrik situation anyway (Holby made Fredrik younger and then reversed it less than a year later) so I'm not too bothered by it.

I hate Faith, and this week gave me even more reasons to. I don't want to waste too much time thinking/talking about her, but I'll just say... you know how I praised Jacob for taking accountability for his actions? Yeah, that stood out not only as a positive step for Jacob, but because it contrasts so massively with Faith - who is doing anything but.

What am I even supposed to say about all this? Faith saw a woman literally suffering from cancer and Faith's apparent only thought was "oh hey, I could tell Stevie I've got the same illness so she feels sorry for me and I can get away with anything!". There's something so awful about her not only lying about being seriously ill, but doing so for such a trivial reason.

I have so much sympathy for Stevie here - she's only recently got away from Marcus, and now she's basically being emotionally abused all over again. I hated seeing Faith gaslight and manipulate her like that.

I hope Stevie figures out what's going on and ends her friendship with Faith for good. Then Stevie can go be friends with Dylan instead. They could be like the Henrik/Jac friendship equivalent for Casualty.

Cameron being fed up with Ryan was nice, in part because I am also fed up with Ryan. Having said that...

I really liked the scenes with Ryan and his patient (did they ever say what his name was? I have to assume they did, but I didn't hear it). Those were cool, and I always love some good disability representation from Casualty!

Are Jodie and Cam going to get together? Only time will tell, but I'm curious now. On that note, I would've liked more Max and Jodie scenes this week.

So yeah, tonight was a good one for Casualty, and I'm thrilled about a potential Jacob/Billie reunion! Yay!

[unloved-cadillac]

i'm going to make you cry -Evil laugh sounds- what about overhaul Angst/Fluff with a S/O who lost the ability to walk in a fire (She has an absorption quirk that allows her to acquire characteristics of everything she touches, for example, if she touched Shigaraki she could have her physical characteristics and copy her quirk) you can make it headcanon or scenario, The one you prefer,thank you!

C/n: Firstly: WOW! What a request. Secondly: I love Overhaul so a fluffy Overhaul makes me melt. And YAY, you’re my first My Hero Academia request! Thanks for the request, Anon and I hope that you enjoy🤍

———————————————————————

I’m a Burden(An Overhaul x Reader Oneshot)

I can’t...move.

Y/n lays on the ground while she tries to regain consciousness.

Everything...hurts.

Screaming. That’s the first thing she hears. When she opens her eyes, everything was on fire. The roof was missing, wood was cut down and bodies were everywhere.

“Y/n! Y/n can you hear me?”, she hears Chronostatis speak to her. “Ha-Hari. I can’t feel, anything.” She tells him. Chrono looks at her body and sees her legs...badly injured.

“Y/n, don’t worry. I’m getting you out of here.”, he says looking around. “Where’s Kai?”, she asks. “I don’t know. I didn’t see him before the explosion.” Explosion? Y/n feels her eyes closing but before she lost consciousness she heard his voice.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ugh what is going on?

Y/n wakes up in a warm bed. When she opens her eyes, she adjusts to the bright lights.

Where am I?

She feels all these types of wires in her and all those beeping noises. Trying to move up, she feels it.

Her legs...they’re...gone.

Lifting the blanket up she sees her legs cut off from her knees downward. Y/n widens her eyes and starts to cry. “Oh my god..”, she puts her head in her hands and ball her eyes out. “No..no this can’t be...this can’t be real.”, she cries out.

Hearing her cries, a doctor and nurse come to her aid. “Ms Y/n. It’s okay, calm down. Let me explain what happened.”, the doctor says while rubbing her back.

Apparently, Y/n had caught the impact of the explosion back at HQ and it really caused a lot of damage to her body. Her legs being the worst. They were practically burnt by the time the ambulance arrived and there was no hope in saving them.

“Where is Kai Chisaki, doc? Have you heard of him?”, y/n asks the doctor. “Mr Chisaki is fine. He is actually waiting to see you.” That makes your breath hitch. How will Kai react to this? He already has so much trouble taking care of himself since his hands were taken away, and now...You couldn’t do that to him.

“No, Doc. I don’t want to see him. Please tell him not to come and don’t tell him of my status.”, you tell the doctor and nurses. Confused, the doctor obeys your wish. You lay in the hospital bed and look out the window. It was raining. I hate rainy days.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks have passed since the accident and Kai had been trying to get to you. But nobody allowed him through since he wasn’t family. He saw your mom and sister go to see you. Why didn’t you want to see him? Was it because he wasn’t there when the explosion happened? Because he was too late in protecting you? Have you finally come to your senses in realizing that he couldn’t take care of you the proper way? No. You weren’t the type of person to leave someone because of a disability. You were kind, warm and loving. And you loved him. At least, that’s what he hoped.

The day had come when you were discharged from hospital. And instead of going back to your shared home with Kai, you went with your mom. She said that she wanted to take care of you and promised to never leave you. A mother’s love, huh?

You had your own wheelchair and within a month, you would start treatment and your prosthetic legs were going to be ready for you.

The hospital also recommended therapy so you could come to terms with what had happened. Which you gladly accepted against your will.

Your mom and sister helped you with everything. You felt bad, and you had told them that. But they slapped your head and told you “Family is family no matter what.” Currently laying on your bed, you scroll through your phone checking messages and missed phone calls. And you see his name.

Kai💜

56 messages

67 missed calls.

Oh my god. You resisted the urge to call him, to hear his voice or to read those messages. You couldn’t...

“Y/n?”, you hear your sister call you. “Yeah?”, you answer back. She comes into your room. “There’s a visitor for you.” Oh god. Please don’t let it be... “It’s Haru? Hari? Anyway he has white-grayish hair and said he was a friend of yours.” Oh thank god. “Hari. Yeah allow him in.” She leaves and you put your phone away waiting for your guest.

“Hey, you.” , you hear Chrono’s voice. “Hi, Hari. How are you? Were you hurt?”, you ask him. “Just a couple of scratches.”, he says walking up to you to sit on your bed. “How are you?” He asks. You look down and feel a few tears slip. You pull off the covers to show him your bandages.

You hear him gasp. It’s soft but it was there. “Y-Y/n. Oh no. I-I’m so sorry.”, he tells you while holding your hand. You shake your head. “It’s okay. Don’t feel sorry for me. I’m fine.” “Can’t you heal them? Your quirk is to absorb other powers. So if you absorbed a healing quirk maybe your legs might-..” “I can’t.” You say bluntly which makes Chrono sigh. “Why not?”

“It wouldn’t last. The doctors said that if I had to absorb a regeneration quirk, my legs would grow back, but I won’t have them forever, so in order to have them forever I have to have someone who is willing to give up their powers for me and I can’t do that. I can’t take someone else’s power for my personal greed. It’s too much of work and too much of trouble.”

Chrono listens intently. Your pure heart always was a pain. Overhaul thought so too. But, none of them argued with you because once you put your mind on something, no one could change your mind.

“Did you speak to Kai?”, Chrono asks you. “No. I can’t have him be with me anymore.” “What? Why not?” “Hari, I’m a burden to him at this state. I would only bother him and make things worse. I can’t have him leaving everything for me. He has a life.”, you explain to him. Chrono pinches the bridge of his nose. “You might be the dumbest person I have ever met.” You widen your eyes. “Huh?” “How could you think that, Y/n? Do you really think he would give up on you that easily? He loves you. He tolerates you. He lets you kiss him, without the mask on. Do you know special you are to him? Y/n, I’m calling him. And I’m telling him where you are.” “No, Hari. Wait..” but he called already. He paced around your room until Kai picked up and when he did Chrono started speaking.

“She’s here, Kai. Come and see her.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chrono left shortly after and you waited. The wait killed you. What was he going to say? Would he break up with you? Your overthinking corrupted your mind until there was a knock on the door.

“Uh, come in.”, you say. The door opens,’and there he was.

“Kai...”, you say softly. He looked so hurt. His eyes were black underneath and although he had his mask on, you could tell he was so disappointed.

He walked up to you and sat on the chair next to your bed. He hadn’t said a word to you yet. “K-Kai say something, please.”, you whisper to him.

But he doesn’t. He just slowly lifts your blanket up with his prosthetic hands and looks at the damage. You heard his breath hitch and saw his eyes widen. You looked down and covered your face with your hands.

“Why didn’t you let me see you?”, he asks softly. You lift your head up and look at him. “I-I..felt like..I would..bother you.” He meets your eyes and shakes his head. “Bother me? How?” He asks simply. “Kai, I won’t be able to walk for a month. I would just be a burden to you.” As soon as you said those words, Kai kissed you. He pulled his mask down, and kissed you. “Dont. You. Ever. Say. That. Again.”, he says in between kisses. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to you in time. I’m sorry that this happened. It’s all my fault.” He apologizes. “No, Kai. Don’t. It’s not your fault.”, you cup his face. “God, I can’t even be mad at you right now. I’m just glad that you’re safe. Chrono told me about how you can’t or better yet, won’t use your quirk. Which is fine. I love you but I’m taking you back home.” He says hugging you. “I love you too.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kai brought you back home, after much debate with your mother. He carried you, bridal style everywhere around the house just to see you smile.

He paid a home doctor to come check up on you and took you to every appointment that needed to be attended. Your mom and sister came to visit and help around but Kai always did the most.

When your prosthetic legs came, Kai helped you learn how to use them. He caught you when you fell, and lifted your spirits up when you felt you couldn’t do it.

“Yes you can, angel. Don’t lose hope. I’m right here.”

You both helped each other with your respective prosthetics. You helped him with his hands and he helped with your legs. You weren’t ready to go out yet and Kai did not mind. He didn’t force you. You were ready, when you were ready.

You joked around about your disability with Kai quite often which made him roll his eyes and chuckle at you. But the best one he heard was when you two were cuddling.

“You know, since you don’t have your hands and I don’t have my legs, we complete each other.”

He smiled and kissed you softly. Yeah, you did complete each other.

———————————————————————

“This came out long af. But I hope that you enjoyed it.”

🖤🤍Thanks for reading🤍🖤

-Caddy.

[lancetuckershairgel]

Words: 1,507

Warnings: none

Tag List: @book-dragon-13 @jobean12-blog @jamesbarnesappreciationclub @buckysforeverprincess @marvelgirl7 @mycupoffanfictionreplies @brat-in-a-teacup @bonkybarnes107 @yelenasbarnes @msruchita @southernbell91 @jhangelface0523 @godofplumsandthunder

"Do you have a big house? Do you have a dog? What about all my clothes and toys at the other house I was at? When can Lucy come stay with us? Can we get ice cream?"

Lily asked a million questions as she sat in her booster seat in the back of Chris' truck. The newly appointed guardian just chuckled and tried his best to answer each one. He had a decent sized house, not very big but not small either. He didn't have a dog. He had arranged for the Michaels to bring all of Lily's things to her later that night. They would pick Lucy up in the morning and ice cream sounded like a perfect treat to celebrate. 

Little did Chris know that the sheriff had put in a call to the judge, his uncle, on behalf of Chris. The man never doubted Chris' ability to take on the girls, but he knew all too well how the justice system worked so he put in a good word and a bit of encouragement to the judge. Now Chris had a very excited little girl kicking her legs against the seat of the truck as he drove off. 

Sure, he was thrilled to have been given custody of both girls but he was also nervous about the way his life was now changed. This wasn't a job anymore, he couldn't just give advice to a kid and leave them at the end of the day. No, he was now essentially a parent and responsible for raising two girls who needed more than just a home. Lily had speech therapy and the judge had ordered that in exchange for Lucy's early release she attend counseling and anger management classes, much to the teenager's disgruntlement. On top of that there was homework, dentist appointments, outbursts, tantrums, and healing to do. Chris was already getting overwhelmed just thinking about it all. 

"Hey Chris?" Lily asked 

"Yeah?" He peered at her in the rearview mirror

"What's custody mean?"

"Well" Chris scratched his beard, trying to think of the best way to explain to a five year old "It means that you and your sister get to live with me and I take care of you." 

"We can live with you forever?" 

"Well, not forever. You're going to be grown up one day and have your own house." 

"Are you our dad now?" Lily asked

"Something like that." 

"Yay!"

Chris smiled as he pulled into the Dairy Queen parking lot. 

---

"Hey Lucy!" Julie said as she sat down at the table Lucy sat at in the common room "You've had a busy week, I heard."

"Yeah seems so" 

"Here, I got you something." Julie slid a can of soda across the table with a smile "Congrats on your placement, kiddo."

"Thanks" Lucy returned a small smile and took the soda, popping the tab and taking a sip "Tomorrow can't come fast enough." 

"I know you're excited."

"I wouldn't say excited, but I'm ready to be out of here."

"Are you going to a foster home?" 

"No, just some guys place."

"Some guy?" Julie raised an eyebrow 

"Oh.." Lucy laughed slightly at the confusion "He's a good guy, a cop. He got custody of my sister and I."

"Is it the man that visits you?"

"That's the one."

"He seems really nice."

"He's okay."

Julie nodded, knowing that she wouldn't get much more out of Lucy about her feelings on the situation. They played a game of Uno before it was dinner time and then Lucy began to go through the trunk of personal items she was allowed to have. She was given a black garbage bag to put her things in and she rummaged through everything, placing item by item inside until she got to the remains of Mr Snow. She felt anger and sadness boil inside her and she slammed the trunk closed. She returned the extra pairs of center issued sweats and tshirts then turned in for the night. Sleep evaded her, her mind wandering through all the possibilities of what living with Chris would be like. 

The next morning Chris and Lily stood just outside the gates, waiting for Lucy to be released. Lily grew impatient and tugged on Chris' hand. 

"When is her coming? I can't see!"

"Calm down, I got you." Chris laughed and lifted Lily onto his shoulders "That better?" 

"Yeah! Now where's my sissy!" 

"Patience, little one" Chris shook his head and Lily crossed her arms over top of it and rested her chin and sighed

It wasn't long before the gate buzzed and Lucy walked out of the door. 

"There she is! Lemme down lemme down!" 

Chris put Lily on the ground and watched as the two sisters ran toward each other. Lucy dropped to her knees and gathered Lily into her arms, hugging her tight. 

"I missed you I missed you I missed you!" Lily cried as she clung to her sister 

"I missed you too, Punk."

 Lucy picked Lily up and grabbed the black trash bag before walking over to Chris.  

"Hey, Luc-"

Chris was cut short when Lucy trusted the bag at his chest and walked past him to the parking lot. 

"Hey Chris, it's great to see you,thanks for springing me from jail. I owe you one" Chris muttered mockingly under his breath as he followed the girls 

Once inside the truck Chris thought he'd try again. 

"Lucy, you hungry?"

"Nah, prison slop fills me right up." 

"I thought we'd go to the buffet but if you're full…" Chris smirked 

"What's a buffet?" both girls asked at the same time and he looked at both of them with raised eyebrows

"Oh you poor things."

Chris drove them into town and stopped at the restaurant. Upon paying, Chris handed the girls their plates and pointed to the buffet lines. 

"Go crazy. It's all you can eat, just don't make yourselves sick and puke in my truck." 

Lucy looked around, a little perplexed as she made her way down the line. Everything looked so good and her poor stomach growled with hunger. She began loading her plate up with everything she could fit. 

"OH. MY. GOSH." Lily squealed and she grabbed Chris' hand, pulling him to the dessert line "WHAT IS THAT?!"

"Shhh." Chris scooped Lily into his arms so that she could get a better view and ignored the looks some customers were giving the loud girl "Inside voice okay? That's a chocolate fountain."

"I want it I want it I want it!" Lily whispered excitedly 

Chris laughed and grabbed a skewer then a piece of strawberry. He helped Lily dip it into the running chocolate and watched her happily eat it as they walked around picking what to put on her plate. 

---

"So, what did you girls think of the restaurant?" Chris asked as they all got back into the truck 

"I want to go there every day!" Lily exclaimed

"My stomach hurts." Lucy grumbled 

"I told you not to over do it." Chris smiled as he pulled out of the parking lot "And we can't go every day, Sweetheart, but we can go back again soon."

Lily seemed satisfied with that deal. The ride home was quiet, with just the radio playing softly. Chris didn't want to push Lucy to talk to him, and Lily was busy looking out the window as they made their way to their new home. Once they arrived, Chris helped Lily out of the truck and headed toward the door. Lucy got out of the truck and stood for a minute, looking at the structure before her. It was a simple ranch house, with a fence around the small yard, and a view of the mountains in the back. Lucy grabbed her bag and made her way through the front door. 

"Welcome home" Chris said softly as she entered the small foyer 

It didn't feel like home to her but she didn't want to tell Chris that. She just gave him a nod and walked past him and into the living room. A beige couch lined the back wall and there was a TV on an entertainment center with not much else in the room. 

"Would you like a tour?" 

"I think I can figure it out." Lucy replied a bit more bitterly than she had intended

"Okay...if you need anything just let me know. I'll let you get settled but I want to talk later."

"Great." Lucy muttered 

She left the room and began to look for the bedroom that would be hers. She entered one bedroom and immediately determined that it was Lily's.  A small bed was lined with stuffed animals and there were Barbie posters on the wall. Lucy closed the door and went into the next room. Inside she found a bed with a grey striped comforter, a dresser, a desk, and something that made Lucy stop in her tracks. 

"This must be mine." Lucy said aloud as she looked at the white saucer chair.